Up Yours- Eminem

Has it really been that long since my last post? Wow, summer sure moves quick and yet somehow manages to provide little in the middle for me to write about.

But, have no fear, Slim Shady is here.
Warning: The following story with links contains explicit language
First off, allow me to start this post by saying how much I dislike Em. Not only do his childhood antics annoy me to death, but his music is just flat out overrated. It actually took me until a few months ago to actually admit that one of his songs was very good (Beautiful- listen below).


Sure he had songs with Nate Dogg and other featured guests that were solid singles. But in all honesty, the rest of his songs are what I'd call "Hip-Pop". Lyrics copied from the latest episode of E! News where Eminem basically bashes reality stars because it's easy and fun mixed with a corny beat and fart sound effects. The guy should be thankful Dr. Dre loves him so much.

Anyway, with that out of the way...
Eminem's latest beef really has me both annoyed and happy. Annoyed because he's getting publicity but happy because the publicity is coming courtesy of a battle he has with a Pop Diva, Mariah Carey. If you are still in the dark on what I'm speaking of, let me catch you up to speed.

Eminem went on Shade45 Radio earlier this summer along with 50 Cent to discuss his "Relapse" album release and preview 50's next album. Somehow, conversation drifted to helicopters and nasty women to the point that Eminem shouted for girls to call up the studio if they wanted him to "pee on them". Which led to the now infamous line heard on the video below at the 1:57 mark ("Already did that!").


Well as you can imagine, this got Mariah and her husband Nick Cannon all in a tizzy. Nick rebuttled with a blog post which has now been deleted calling Em all sorts of names and explitives. Mariah came back with something all her own- a smash hit single called "Obsessed" with lyrics directed at Eminem. Probably the only time a Diva has taken down a rap star at their own game!


Now here's where we come to the present day. If I were Eminem I'd consider it done, over, squashed. You opened your mouth trying to be funny (whether his claims were true or not) and had it come right back and slap you across the jaw. Wave the white flag and go promote your first album in 4 years.
BUT NO. Slim Shady just couldn't take being the butt of jokes that Mariah had out-done Detroit's finest lyricst. So in order to have the last word, Em just released this little diddy yesterday over the internet.


Seriously man? Are you really going to start a war with a chick? Do you really want to go down this way?
Tupac vs. Biggie
Nas vs. Jay-Z
Rick Ross vs. 50 Cent
Eminem vs. Mariah ?!?!?!?

Get real. Make real music without bringing up the past, or even worse, a past that never was.
Seriously Mr. Shady, UP YOURS!

You Just Can't Keep Memphis Down...Literally

For those fans out there that think my Memphis Tigers aren't going to experience success now that Coach Cal is gone, you should reconsider your thought process.

One of the biggest reasons- Will Coleman.

Listed as one of the top JUCO prospects in the 2009 recruiting class, he's already drawing rave reviews from around the Memphis area and his workouts/scrimmages are becoming local legend this summer.

Don't believe me?
Just take a look at this picture and it should do the explaining. This was taken at a recent training session where trainers were testing some numbers for Coleman. He exceeded the 42" limit on the vertical test. Ya, he jumped higher than the thing could measure! Look out ladies and gentlemen, look out...

Dunk You Very Much

You know, I love Lebron James. Everything about him. The fact that he's 6'9 and weighs somewhere around 270 and can move like a point guard. The fact that he actually plays defense and distributes the ball giving him a REAL stat card (take that Kobe). The fact that he was an all-state football player in high school. Even the fact that he stole Kevin Garnett's "powder" entrance and has made it his own. I stood up for 'Bron after the "Yankees hat" incident at the Indians game and when he put on parachute pants at the ESPYs. But more importantly, I admired Lebron as a class act. 

Well, maybe I should say had been a class act. 

I don't know what came over my boy after the playoffs. Sure, he's a man that talks and talks about his competitive side and how he can't stand to lose. But isn't every player at the pro level? Are you telling me Delonte West wasn't heart broken after being denied a trip to the Finals? Still, West stuck around and paid his dues, congratulating the Magic. Lebron? Well see for yourself.

Even worse, #23 didn't even apologize for his actions when he was interviewed shortly after. 

But even that kind of poor sportsmanship is shadowed when talking about James latest antics. If you haven't heard by now, I'll spare my fingers the typing and just hyperlink you to the details (click here).  

So why all the fuss? You got dunked on. It happens in basketball all the time.

Ask Xavier Henry, KU's 5-Star freshman who's expected to be one of the top NBA prospects in a year.

Or how about Kendrick Perkins vs. a 5'8 Nate Robinson. We all got to see that too.

Even Lebron's idol, Michael Jordan, the best of ALL TIME, was the victim instead of the assassin at one point.  

So what's the big deal? Listen, Crawford is a Division 1 college basketball player. He was invited to the James camp, so he's got to be relatively good. As he describes it, James just jumped a little late because he didn't catch him coming in time. He attempted the block and came up short. Stuff happens right? It could be worse...

Phillip Rivers recently got schooled in the art of accuracy by a high school QB who isn't even listed in the Rivals.com database-

So wipe up your tears Lebron. Be the person I think you are and call up Nike. Release the tape to the media. In the meantime, call up Crawford and ink a new commercial deal worth lots of money to joke around about "The Dunk". 

Because until then, you're losing ground fast as being "The Chosen Class Act" and we're all witnesses. 

Up Yours- Andy Samberg

I'll keep this short and sweet because giving this guy a lengthy, detailed post would just be wrong; he's not nearly deserving. 

From the moment I noticed this guy on SNL, I thought, "They're gonna have to do something creative with this guy or he's gonna be off this show because...he's just not that funny". Well props to Mr. Michaels and the heads at SNL for finding something creative Andy can do. 

First it was "Dick in a Box" which was pure genius. From there, it just got weird and annoying and played out. "Jizz in my Pants" was alright I guess, but "I'm on a Boat" is the worst song to hear at a bar since "Sweet Caroline". Within a week, I'd heard that random piece of music at least 100 times and as good as it was the 1st time, well, it's just not anymore...at all. 

Anyway, thanks to Samberg's "success" we now have advertising guru's cashing in on the comedic musical idea. Check out what Taco Bell decided to do recently...

Laugh out loud funny huh? Ya, not so much. So Andy Samberg- Up Yours bro. 

It's Been A While

Lucky for you, I did manage to find this...